Conflict Resolution Coach

Guides you through difficult conversations with structured preparation scripts, active listening frameworks, and proven de-escalation techniques. This agent helps you navigate workplace disagreements, personal relationship conflicts, neighbor disputes, and family tensions with empathy-driven communication strategies. Works across cultural contexts with frameworks from Crucial Conversations, Nonviolent Communication (NVC), and the Harvard Negotiation Project, applicable to face-to-face discussions, email, Slack, and video calls.

Supported Platforms & Integrations

Platform	Integration Type	Features
Slack	Message drafting	De-escalated message rewrites for workplace channels
Microsoft Teams	Message drafting	Professional conflict resolution messages
Email (Gmail/Outlook)	Draft preparation	Measured, empathetic email responses
Zoom / Google Meet	Pre-call prep	Video call preparation scripts and talking points
WhatsApp	Personal messaging	Relationship conflict message crafting
In-Person	Script preparation	Face-to-face conversation rehearsal scripts

When to Use This Agent

• Use this when you need to have a difficult conversation with a colleague, manager, or direct report

• Use this when a personal relationship conflict is escalating and you want to de-escalate

• Use this when you received an aggressive message and need to craft a measured response

• Use this when preparing for a negotiation where emotions might run high

• Use this when mediating between two people who are in conflict

• Use this when you feel angry and want to communicate your concerns without damaging the relationship

• Consider alternatives when you need legal mediation or formal HR intervention

• Consider alternatives when dealing with harassment or abuse (contact appropriate authorities)

• Consider alternatives when seeking ongoing therapy or counseling for deep-seated issues

Quick Start

Copy
# conflict-config.yml
conflict:
  type: "workplace"
  relationship: "peer"
  situation: "Colleague takes credit for joint work in meetings"
  your_feelings: "frustrated, undervalued"
  desired_outcome: "fair credit attribution going forward"
  communication_channel: "in-person"
  urgency: "moderate"

First run example:

> My colleague keeps presenting our joint work as their own in team meetings. I need to address this.

Preparation Phase:
  Your core need: Recognition for your contributions
  Their possible perspective: May not realize they are doing it, or may feel insecure about their own contributions

Opening Script:
  "Hey [Name], I wanted to talk about something that has been on my mind. When we present our joint projects, I have noticed that the framing sometimes makes it sound like a solo effort. I want to make sure we are both getting credit for the work we do together. Can we talk about how to handle presentations going forward?"

If they get defensive:
  "I am not accusing you of anything intentional. I just want to find a system that works for both of us..."

Desired agreement:
  "Could we alternate who presents, or introduce sections as 'Name and I worked on this together'?"

Advanced Configuration

Copy
# Communication framework
framework:
  primary: "NVC"
  backup: "crucial-conversations"
  cultural_context: "US-workplace"

# Your profile
profile:
  conflict_style: "avoidant"
  emotional_state: "frustrated"
  relationship_priority: "high"
  power_dynamic: "equal"

Parameter	Type	Default	Description
conflict_type	string	"general"	Options: workplace, personal, family, neighbor, service
relationship	string	"peer"	Options: peer, manager, report, partner, family, friend
communication_channel	string	"in-person"	Options: in-person, email, slack, call, text
framework	string	"NVC"	Options: NVC, crucial-conversations, harvard, blended
conflict_style	string	"balanced"	Your natural style: avoidant, accommodating, competitive, balanced
power_dynamic	string	"equal"	Options: equal, you-higher, them-higher
emotional_state	string	"calm"	Current emotional state for calibrated advice
urgency	string	"moderate"	Options: immediate, moderate, can-wait
desired_outcome	string	""	What you want to achieve from the conversation
relationship_priority	string	"high"	How much you value preserving this relationship
history	string	"first-time"	Options: first-time, recurring, escalating

Core Concepts

Concept	Description
NVC (Nonviolent Communication)	Observe facts, express feelings, identify needs, make requests — without blame
The Story We Tell	Separating observable facts from the narrative we construct about intent
Psychological Safety	Creating conditions where the other person does not feel attacked or cornered
BATNA	Best Alternative to Negotiated Agreement — your fallback if conversation fails
Repair Attempts	Small gestures during tense moments that signal "I am still on your side"

+------------------+     +-------------------+     +------------------+
| Situation Input  | --> | Perspective       | --> | Script Generator |
| (conflict, your  |     | Analyzer          |     | (opening, body,  |
|  feelings, goal) |     | (both sides)      |     |  responses)      |
+------------------+     +-------------------+     +------------------+
                                                          |
                                                          v
+------------------+     +-------------------+     +------------------+
| Complete Toolkit | <-- | Exit Strategy     | <-- | De-escalation    |
| (scripts, tips,  |     | (if it goes wrong |     | Library          |
|  follow-up plan) |     |  or goes well)    |     | (phrases, moves) |
+------------------+     +-------------------+     +------------------+

Workflow Examples

Scenario 1: Asking Manager for Overdue Raise

Input: "I have not had a raise in 2 years despite strong performance reviews. My manager keeps saying 'next quarter.' I feel undervalued and am considering leaving."
Output:
Preparation: Document your achievements with metrics. Know your market rate (Glassdoor, Levels.fyi). Have your BATNA ready (another offer or willingness to leave).

Opening: "I wanted to revisit the compensation conversation we have had a few times. I have been here 2 years, my last two reviews were exceeds-expectations, and I want to make sure my compensation reflects my contributions. Can we talk about a concrete timeline?"

If "budget constraints": "I understand budgets are tight. Can we put a specific number and date in writing so I can plan around it? If a raise is not possible this quarter, are there other forms of recognition — a title change, equity, or a one-time bonus?"

If "let me check": "I appreciate that. Can we schedule a follow-up for next Friday so this does not slip again? I will send a calendar invite."

Firm close: "I want to be direct — I love working here, but I need to feel my compensation matches my contribution. I would hate for this to become a reason to look elsewhere."

Scenario 2: Roommate Not Doing Chores

Input: "Roommate never cleans common areas. Passive-aggressive notes have not worked. I am resentful but do not want to make living together unbearable."
Output:
NVC Framework Applied:
Observation (fact only): "The dishes have been in the sink for 3 days and the kitchen counter has not been wiped in over a week."
Feeling: "I feel frustrated and a bit resentful, which I do not want to feel toward someone I live with."
Need: "I need shared spaces to be reasonably clean so I can feel comfortable at home."
Request: "Could we set up a simple chore rotation — maybe alternating weeks — so it is clear and fair?"

Avoid: "You never clean" (accusation), "I always do everything" (exaggeration), sticky notes (passive-aggressive)
De-escalation if defensive: "I am not trying to be your parent. I just want a system we both agree on so neither of us feels burdened."

Scenario 3: Responding to an Aggressive Slack Message

Input: "A colleague wrote in Slack: 'This is the third time this feature shipped broken. Does anyone on this team actually test their code?' I am furious."
Output:
Step 1 — Do NOT respond immediately. Wait 30 minutes minimum.
Step 2 — Acknowledge your anger. It is valid. They were unprofessional.
Step 3 — Draft response (private DM, not public channel):

"Hey [Name], I saw your message in #engineering. I understand the frustration with the bug — I am not happy about it either. I would appreciate if we could discuss quality issues directly rather than in the public channel, since it affects the whole team's morale. Happy to sync on what happened and how we can improve our QA process."

If they escalate: Take it to your manager or theirs. Document the Slack message with a screenshot.
If they apologize: Accept gracefully: "No worries, I know you were frustrated. Let us figure out how to catch these earlier."

Best Practices

Separate the person from the problem. The moment you frame a conflict as "me vs. them," you lose. Reframe it as "us vs.

Name your emotions without weaponizing them. Saying "I feel frustrated when my contributions are not acknowledged" is constructive. Saying "You make me furious" is an attack. The NVC framework teaches that emotions are yours — no one "makes" you feel anything.

Prepare for three scenarios. Before any difficult conversation, prepare for: best case (they agree and apologize), middle case (they get defensive but eventually come around), and worst case (they refuse to engage or escalate). Having scripts for all three reduces anxiety and prevents you from being blindsided. The agent generates responses for all three pathways.

Time the conversation deliberately. Never initiate a difficult conversation when either party is hungry, tired, rushed, or in front of others. "Can we talk for 15 minutes after lunch?" is always better than ambushing someone before a meeting or sending a late-night text. The right timing can be the difference between resolution and escalation.

Follow up in writing. After a verbal resolution, send a brief follow-up message: "Thanks for the conversation today. Just to confirm, we agreed to [specific agreement]. Let me know if I captured that correctly." This prevents future disputes about what was agreed and shows you take the resolution seriously.

Common Issues

Problem: You freeze up during the actual conversation. Practice the script out loud beforehand — even reading it to yourself in the mirror helps. Bring notes if needed. It is completely acceptable to say "I wrote down a few thoughts so I could express this clearly" before starting the conversation.

Problem: The other person cries or gets very emotional. Pause and acknowledge: "I can see this is emotional for you too. Do you want to take a minute?" Do not rush to fix it. Tears are not a manipulation tactic — they are a sign that the issue matters deeply to them too.

Problem: Nothing changed after the conversation. Follow up in writing with the specific agreement. If behavior does not change within the agreed timeframe, have a shorter follow-up: "We talked about X two weeks ago and agreed on Y. I have not seen that change yet.

Privacy & Data Handling

• Local processing: All conflict analysis, script generation, and coaching happens locally within your Claude Code session. No personal or relationship details are transmitted externally.
• Data retention: Your conflict details and generated scripts exist only during the active session. Nothing is stored between conversations.
• Export options: Export scripts as plain text for your notes app, or markdown for structured reference. Print scripts if you want a physical reference during the conversation.
• Sensitive data: The agent processes only the context you provide. It does not access your messages, emails, Slack history, or any communication platforms.
• Therapeutic boundaries: This agent provides communication coaching, not therapy. For ongoing emotional distress, relationship trauma, or mental health concerns, consult a licensed therapist or counselor.